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This update was handed out at Macworld at the Jacob Javits Center
in New York City on July 19th, 2000.




Apple:
Mac OS XXX
(Exhibition Hall 3A)
Take an exciting sneak preview at the adult version of Mac’s new operating system, featuring POSIX file system semantics, NFS file sharing, and hot lesbo action.


Napster:

Macster 6.0 (3B)
A must-have for the e-music fan, this groundbreaking upgrade actually enters artists’ homes and steals CDs from their personal collections.

Electronic Arts:
SimMacWorld 2000 (1B)
From the makers of SimCity and The Sims, SimMacWorld 2000 challenges the user to navigate virtual exhibits, amass worthless handouts, and gaze longingly at Steve Jobs during his virtual keynote, all the while learning about exciting new technologies and meeting down-to-earth and interesting sales representatives. (Hi, Pete!)

ViraCo:
5000 Viruses (Galleria)
This CD-ROM contains over 5000 extremely exciting and damaging computer viruses! Do not buy this.

Dell:
iDOS
(1A)
For the true PC die-hard, this new iMac clone runs entirely on MS-DOS. The elegant square machine comes in four flavors: beige, khaki, off-white and tan.

Microsoft:
Entourage Bug Fix Suite (1A)
For the first time, Microsoft has released a set of three CD-ROMs containing hundreds of bug fixes for one of its applications—before the application has even shipped.
eKervork:
Virtual Suicide (3D)
While real suicide is scary and the absence of suicide is boring, Virtual Suicide is a safe and easy alternative. (Now automatically erases your Minesweeper top scores!)

Hewlett-Packard:
PrinterJam 2.0 (North Pavillion)
Laser printers are jammed 40 to 60 percent of the time anyway; why not buy one that won’t keep you guessing? With this permanently jammed printer, you can shift your energies to more rewarding projects, like hand-copying everything you see on the screen.

Apple:
Steve Jobs’ Beard (3C)
Come see the hair that once belonged to one of Macworld’s most important chins: the one attached to the face of the head of Steve Jobs' body.

Emagine:
Kid E. Komputer (1B)
This new machine, designed entirely by parents concerned about their children being exposed to sex and violence on the Internet, does not turn on.

eSoft:
TheMadCompressor
(North Pavillion)
RunningLowOnDiskSpace?SoWere
WeUntilWeCreatedTheMadComp-
ressorWhichGetsRidOfWastefulBla-
nkSpacesInYourDocuments.You’ll
NeverNoticeAnyDifference.



NOTE: For those of you who brought your machines in today for the scheduled iMac beauty pageant, that event has been canceled because it was totally stupid.














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