Pages from My First Presidentiary



My Heart Will Go On
What to do in case of a Vice-Presidential heart attack


Cool and Unusual Punishment
Dubya unveils the Executionator


All the President's Mnemonics
How Dubya remembers who he hired


Dubya to Mumia: No Clemency!
Bush cracks down hard on the NBA's all-time leading scorer


Other POTUS funnies



The Columbia Letters
Kevin Guilfoile and John Warner respond to an eager pupil.



W: The Motion Picture

George W. Bush unveils his new campaign slogans


Colin Powell's Schedule at a Glance
Rockin' with the Secretary of State


I Wanna Veto Bills All Nite (and Party Every Day)
Bush picks the hits


CyberUniting, Not CyberDividing
Dubya spams "Internet Al" Gore


The W is for Writer
The president discusses his new book and the literary life


FAQ: The Bush Daughters
The lowdown on the President's progeny


elcome to ashington
Other est ing pranks


George W. Bush's Wish List
What Amazon doesn't want you to see


Read W's Inauguration Day Schedule


Read W's Diaries from last year's convention


West Winging It
The first hundred days of George W.


Kevin Guilfoile and John Warner discuss My First Presidentiary — read the transcript!




FLASH! My First Presidentiary is Oprah's pick of the month!

ALSO: Leave Jenna Bush Alone!
A special plea from Modern Humorist



BACK IN TEXAS we have a word for smartypantses like those folks at Modern Humorist: "Smartypants folks." Still, they've been nice enough to help me publish my new book, "My First Presidentiary: A Scrapbook by George W. Bush" (with help from Kevin Guilfoile and John Warner). If you click your arrow thing on the book cover, you can buy it.

Want to keep track of all my White House adventures? Sign up for my special pen-pal service below. Also on this page you can find some sample pages from my book, as well as some special Web-only funnies. And I've hidden some "Easter Eggs" on this site: lists of national enemies, launch codes, that sort of thing. Remember, America: All your base are belong to us!

THIS IS A REAL BOOK YOU CAN BUY, REALLY!

buy my book


see the cover bigger


What do the book critiquers have to say about my great new paperback?
Seattle Weekly
Ironminds
About.com
Milwaukee Journal Sentinel
Boston Phoenix
Entertainment Weekly
And what do the regular folks of this great nation have to say?
Signum Press Beloit College Poli-Sci dept.
Wally The Columbus Dispatch
Comedy Reporter
Beth and her boyfriend
"Shrek" fans

For more on the book, my feud with
Mark Twain, and information about my co-authors,
go to myfirstpresidentiary.com.

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